My boyfriend’s debt and crypto loss cost me $48K. Can I trust him?

Dear Penny,

My boyfriend of three years now has charged up $10,000 on my credit card until finally I put a stop to it. He started a business with a food truck and says he will pay me back and not to worry. Well, he’s only giving me $300 each month, and $160 goes to interest.

He lives with me and only pitches in $300 for rent and $200 for bills. The rent is $1,000. He says times are hard for him right now and that he can’t get credit cards because he’s denied due to his “low credit score.” Yet I haven’t seen any proof in the form of denial letters. I don’t fully trust him, therefore I haven’t been able to tell him I love him. He tells me every day that he loves me.

With crypto, he had me invest $40,000 and assured me he knew what he was doing. Well, it’s down to $2,000. He hasn’t shown me anything so I really don’t know if he has moved it to his crypto wallet or what.

I hate to argue or have discussions because he’s never clear with me. He also owes me $900 cash because he is behind on rent and bills. What should I do?


Robin Hartill [ The Penny Hoarder ]

Dear L.,

Manipulative people thrive when others are perpetually confused, so don’t expect clarity from your boyfriend. Listen to your gut instead.

You know you can’t trust your boyfriend. You know he’s sucked nearly $50,000 out of you over three years. The bleeding will only continue if you stay. I think you know what you should do: You should end this relationship.

I wish you could just change the locks tomorrow and have him out of your life. But you’re not going to get any cooperation from your boyfriend once you dump him, so it’s important that you prepare, even if that means you have to delay things a bit. Avoid bringing up relationship issues and your lack of trust in the discussions you need to have. Stick to the financial matters at hand.

Since your boyfriend owes you nearly $11,000, I’d ask him to sign a promissory note for your own peace of mind. At least if he’s willing, you’ll have it in writing…

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